Feeling Useless? You Are Worthy in GOD's eyes

There are times in my life that I felt like a piece of garbage, useless, only make things worse. Even the slightest negative comment from a close friend can make it worse, make me feeling more useless. Fail is common in human life, but when this failure affect people I love, I grew insecure and inferior. This is a very unpleasant experience, a very heart-aching feelings.

Often when I feel I'm useless, it so easy to make a bad decision like ending my life by consuming too much sleep pills. It seems that death is more pleasant than bear this feeling. This problem will end when death come. Then suddenly, I remember how God love me, He had sacrifice Himself for me, how can I ended my life when God had died for me to live? I'm worthy in HIS eyes, so worthy that HE gave His most precious to save me from sin and death. 

My live is not mine anymore, it belong to GOD for HE had pay the price when He died in the cross. No matter how imperfect I am, no matter how many flaws I had, He still love me, I am precious and worthy in HIS eyes. GOD's love is the source of strength that I ever needed, even if live seems so much hard to bear, even if there's so many problem, I always know that God will help me. everyday walking with HIM is sweeter than anything in this world, and I will be forever grateful for His love for me.

Help other with sincere heart

Today I realize how often I already help other people in my life. and when I recall that feeling after I help them, it was a very happy and joyful feeling. and I began to wonder, why I felt that way? I did get tired and at some point people would see that I'm being used, but why I feel joy?

Then I found out that my heart is satisfied by helping other, because love. love need to be shown to other, when I share my love and help them with sincere heart, my love grows more. and I realize when I love other, GOD will love me more. and that joyful feeling is GOD gift for me for being sincere and share my love.

Now I strive to help more people as often as I can, because I crave for that joy and contempt feeling, and more importantly I crave for GOD love to me. although people would say that I loved to be used, I don't care, I know what I feel, I know what I get, and I think I get many benefit from it. God Bless Us. Amin

As God Forgive me, I shall forgive other

Being accused of something I never did was a hurtful experience, it cut deep into my heart like a blunt knife. He never knew how hurt I am because of what he said to me, he never knew how hurt it is to be accused wrongfully. Feeling hurt, my instinct react to be angry and take revenge, but God speak to my heart, He calm me down and say : "For I have forgive you, so you shall forgive him". I cried at that very moment, I know so many times I hurt God's heart, so many times I yell at HIM and say something bad to HIM, but HE forgiven me . . . This love I felt inside me is stronger than the scar in my heart, stronger than my instinct. I learn a lesson that moment, that I should forgive no matter how hurt I am, because GOD had forgiven me too.

Love is strong, love can cover all hurt feeling and change that into joy, love never fail. Where can we get that love? of course in GOD, the main source of love, unconditional love that is. Go get near to GOD, and HE will give peace and joy in your heart so that you can forgive even the most cruel thing other had done to you. Only God truly know how we feels, and only God had the cure for all our pain.

Rhema V.S Logos

In christian life there are two way we can see the scripture. one is the written words of God logos and the words of God spoken specifically for each unique christian called rhema. this two may seems alike because all is the words of God, but it has a very different impact in christian life.

Rhema
God can speak to us in many different ways, sometimes He speaks to all His people at once, but sometimes He speaks specifically to one unique individual. This is what is called a rhema, word of God specifically spoken to one unique individual, He speak differently for each and every one of us. This happen not so often, sometimes to remind us about some error in our way, sometimes to comfort us when we had great burden, sometimes He just wanted to show us that He loves us. We can only hear this rhema when we had a very close relation with God Himself.

Logos
This is the written word of God in Holy Bible. It contain general rule to life as a christian, it is not specifically directed for one individual life, but for all christian in general. while this is not as significant as rhema, we still need logos to know God more, and when we knew Him deeper then we will hear His rhema. Logos is the basic knowledge we need as a christian while rhema is on a advance spiritual level.

Each day we need to hear God speak to us in logos or in rhema, to really life as a christian that please God's heart. because His word is the only guidance we could really rely on in this world. Without His guidance, we will lost and will eventually fall in the cliff of hell.

Temptation today

Every single day walking with Jesus is a challenge on itself. To be rightful in front of God, to please His heart, there are many rules to obey. God says that temptation will come, but He promise to help us to win against that temptation.

Today is no different with other day I lived my life, many old and new temptation came to me. I struggle not to fall to commit sin, I pray to God that He would help me to overcome this temptation, particularly this masturbation and porn temptation. Because of my job on internet, I expose myself each and everyday to the source of information (whether it's a good or damaging material). being online means that I could easily access porn and do masturbation. I struggle, I pray, I listen to gospel music, read the holy bible to overcome this temptation, I hope that this will make me forget about that explicit sexual material and those dirty mind of mine.

But today I won again because God always there for me, He remind me of how He love me and how He wanted me to grow greater in His eyes, therefore I must abandon this dirty hobby of mine (porn and masturbation). God's love me and He didn't want me to love other things beside Him. if porn get in the way of my relationship with God, than I must get rid of it.

God demand our full love, not partial. He wanted us to love Him with all of our heart, with all of our mind and body. I'm glad that I can satisfy His love by listening to His word, praise and worship Him trough songs and doing good things toward other people. It's more joyful to be in His presence than anywhere else, more satisfying than sexual impurity.

Harvest time

Matthew 9:35-38

When a farmer saw the yellowing fields ready for harvest, then immediately the tiredness from the job he had to do during the planting season were gone and replaced with the joy of waiting for the harvest that he would soon enjoy. But, if when the harvest time arrived and the farmer has no workers to reap, then he would be very sad and feel all the things he worked before, it becomes useless.

Like our Father in Heaven. He is very excited to see how much the harvest of souls on earth, but He will be very sad when He discovered how few the people who want to reap souls.

Today let us together come to the Father and ask His heart to be in our hearts. Many times we are too busy with our own lives that we forget to feel great joy when we saw the harvest. We are busy taking care of our own lives, and forgetting about the harvest that has waited in front of our eyes. Now is the time for us to look again at the harvest, and more than that, prepare ourselves well to work together to reap them. Each of us has a part that cannot be replaced by someone else to reap the souls, so let's do this together for the glory and joy of our Father.

Are You a Generous?

Ask yourself these following questions, this could be an indication if you are generous enough. • Do you see God as the owner of the property and your existence? • Do you perceive yourself as the treasurer of God? • Have you dedicated all you have to God: money, property, health, time, family and the ability/skill? • How often do you sacrifice for the sake of others? • Do you honor God by giving a decent part for Him, and not just give 'tips'? • Do you easily give time to see someone in need? Generosity is the result of focus on the wealth of God and not on our resources.